I LIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This has pretty much been me all week.
(This is actually my aunt's dog.)

Last year on spring break, I went to a group exercise class which made me so sore that I quite literally could not walk (without looking like an old lady) for three days.  This year I ended up with a stomach virus, which was introduced to me by my mother, who carried it home from the little plague rats she teaches.

Today I am finally able to return to my normal state of being.  (Yesterday, going to the library for five minutes absolutely exhausted me.  I had to come home and take a nap.)  But that brings me to my point today:

Spring break is not about getting ahead or being the best at everything.  Spring break is a time to play catch up and to lay in bed for three days feeling miserable and making your mom bring you various forms of sport beverages.  (I requested pedialyte; I got gatorade.)

I admit, when I go home to see my family, I am a great big baby about EVERYTHING.  I let my mom make my meals, I don't clean my bedroom, and I make special grocery requests.  I even let my mother do my laundry, which she hasn't done since I was sixteen years old.

But for serious, I live five minutes from this thing.

And what do I do?  I sit on the couch, work on job applications, go shopping, and watch a ridiculous amount of tv.  So really, being sick wasn't that much of a change from my normal spring break anyway.

But I'm doing all of it for a very good reason:  When I leave, my mother won't miss me.  Nope, no empty nest syndrome here!  Now if you'll excuse me, I have to get dressed to go see The King's Speech.  Which I will not be paying for.

Why would I want to go anywhere else for spring break?

And Now, a Message From Our Sponsors

Hello,
For those of you who don't know, my name is Chewbacca.  I am a 5 pound canine who strongly dislikes Amanda, unless she is giving me food.  (I have also heard that she has her own dog who is less than dignified at all times, but that is neither here nor there.)  Regardless, she is a bad influence on my owner and I would appreciate it if she would disappear from my life.

That is why I am pleased to announce that Amanda has come down with "a wicked case of the stomach flu," and will be unable to provide you with any sort of wisdom today.  She also says to enjoy your spring breaks, and that she will return on Wednesday.

Thank you for your patience.

You Will Curse the Day You Did Not Do.....

Le sigh.  It is going to be a long week.  I need to work on my article, my appellate brief, my cite-checking assignment, and somehow get all my reading done.  And I should probably start outlining.  Eventually.  It's only Monday morning, and I think I'm ready to have a panic attack.  Why?  Because I have already been annoyed multiple times today!  Shall we count together?

1.  The undergrads.  Dear undergraduate students.  I realize that sometimes you, too, have classes in the Lewis building.  Please take the designated elevators for your building though.  They are larger and there's a skybridge to Lewis.  That way, we law students can take our designated elevators and not have to wait for all five hundred of you to go up first.  Also, if you were NOT the first person there, don't cram yourself onto the elevator.   Seriously.  If I beat you to the line of elevators, I will accidentally-on-purpose hit you in the face with my 30 pound backpack when you try to squeeze me out of said elevator.  (I did that this morning.  Violence is sometimes the answer.)  I don't CARE that you're going to be late to class.  Spend less time on your hair in the morning, and take an earlier train.

2.  Sick.  Ugh.  I HATE being sick.  And it's that lovely cold virus that we all have, so I'm constantly sniffling and sneezing and having everyone glare at me for being a plague rat.  And since everyone thinks I'm going to give them a disease, Nyquil is my only friend.  (And what a glorious friend it is too, considering the construction going on outside my window.)

3.  The Construction Outside My Window.  I don't know what you're doing to the road out there, but must you start jackhammering at 5:30 am?  And those metal plates you've been putting down to cover up the holes you're making?  Yeah, cars driving over those all night is a loud, loud thing.

4.  I'm a loser.  The Boy keeps beating me at Scrabble.  I am the Scrabble Queen!!  This is such an embarrassment to the title.

5.  Phantom of the Opera.  Seriously, if I have to hear the song "All I Ask of You" one more time on Pandora, I will END someone.  I love the website with all my heart, but it seems to think I love listening to Sarah Brightman OVER AND OVER AGAIN.  I don't.  At all.  Not even a little bit.

A Love Letter

I was faithful. I was kind. I tried everything that you wanted me to. I was always honest with you. About my love, about my schedule, about everything you needed from me. We were together all the time. In school, in the park, on the street, even in the bath, I was holding on to you with all my strength.

But I guess if you really love something you have to let it go, and if it comes back to you it was meant to be. But I needed you, and I still need you! I can't get through this life without you! Why are you determined to hurt me so much? Why do you want to give me such stabbing pain that sends me to my bed alone for hours.

I'm spending time and tears on you and you give me nothing in return! And I need you more than ever at this point. You can't desert me now! I need you round the clock, like I need to breathe!

Oh, coffee, I have to give you up in order to avoid the migraines.

I'm with your half brother Decaf now. It's not as good as when I was with you.

Forever love,

Me

Prescription: Law School

Well, it’s official. I’m sick for the first time this semester. Luckily, I’m only a little bit sick: hoarse, with a stuffy nose and itchy eyes. I was sick quite often last semester with much worse than this. I had a terrible cold, a trip to the emergency room, swine flu, and a case of what may have been pneumonia. I believe that I am well-qualified to offer advice about how to be sick during grad school. And so, the LIST OF SICK!!!

1. Don’t wait. If you think you’re really sick and need medical attention, go to the doctor’s office or the student health center or something. Do not wait until you have to call your Law School BFF to drive you to the emergency room early in the morning. (Also, if you need your law school BFF to drive you to the emergency room early in the morning, do not wake her up with a “Good morning, sunshine!” She will want to kill you.)

2. Take your medicine. Billy, don’t be a hero. Stuff yourself with meds. NyQuil before bed, the antibiotics that the doctor prescribed you, Tylenol for your headache and sore throat. Take it all. It’s important that you be able to cope with number three.

3. Go to class. Yes, you still have to go to class. Sure you’re sick now, but you’ll be sick again, and you can’t afford to start skipping class for no reason. Bring your Kleenex and a big cup of tea, and start taking notes. Also try not to sound like death, because of number four.

4. Don’t let anyone know you’re sick. Law students are particularly nervous people. If you get any of them sick, they will never forgive you. And do you remember that post about having friends? You should probably just avoid people while you’re sick. You won’t infect anyone else, and you’ll keep your secret.

5. Sleep. Medicine may be good for coping, but sleep is the magic ingredient of health. When I had the swine flu, I went home between classes and napped on top of getting ten hours a night. While it might get you a little behind on work now, you don’t want to lose time later because you’re even sicker.

There you go, the top five things to do when you’re sick in grad school. Have a great weekend everybody! I’ll be in the library driving myself a little crazy!

(For extra credit, see this post over on The Naked Redhead about why it's okay not to want kids. She's a funny chica!)