You Have to Walk Before You Can Run

I mentioned in a very recent post that I spent a lot of last semester sick. And as anyone who has been blessed with a wicked case of the swine flu can tell you, that stuff will knock you down for the count. Due to my non-functioning body, exercise went right out the window for me last semester, and boy did I pay for it at the beginning of this one. Which is too bad, because 2010 is THE YEAR OF THE MINI.

That’s right, in a foolish, prideful moment, I promised my best friend from high school, Mandy, that I would run the Fort Wayne mini with her this fall. I tried to get back into the swing of things in the first week of school. I may have quit after a mile. Okay, a half mile.

It’s probably not necessary to describe how disappointed I was in myself. I immediately decided the mini was over for me and I was going to go back to a life of slovenly joy. Then I rapidly gained five pounds, and I was back on track for the mini. I got on the elliptical last week just to get my confidence back up, and I cut the speed on the treadmill by a lot on Wednesday night, but I made it 3.5 miles, which is farther than I’ve been able to run in about 8 months. And the mini is all about distance, not speed, so I’m okay with that.

I feel like second semester of law school is like that. We knew so much by the end of the first semester. I have a really good basic knowledge of Civil Procedure. I feel like I could defeat a claim for summary judgment. Subleases and Landlord Tort Liability? Not so much. But maybe that’s just because I can’t see the whole picture yet.

I’m an impatient person. I like to have all the answers, all the knowledge, and all the stamina right away. I give up fast when I don’t get it the first time. But if I just slow down a little, maybe I can get it the second time through. And now I can say by February, I should be able to run five miles. And I'm finally starting to understand what the hell is going on in Property.

One step at a time.

Inappropriate

Quick uninteresting post because I have too much to do:

Tonight, instead of doing the mountains of research and reading that I have to do, I shopped online for five hours.

I am now the proud owner of a new bra.

And that is why I am the worst law student.

Committing the Sin of Lawcest

Lawcest, for those who don’t know, is dating someone from law school. It’s especially bad if it’s someone in your own year, or even more incestuous, someone in your own section. Lawcest is an activity that doesn’t really come highly recommended for several reasons, including:

1. There is no personal space. You already see each other every day, possibly in every class. And during lunch break. And in the library after class. And then you’re going to go out to dinner too? You will have nothing to talk about. And can you imagine moving in together during your lawcestuous relationship? (That is if you’re NOT Italian Catholic and named Amanda?) You would never have any time apart. Spending too much time together is unhealthy for any relationship.

2. Everyone knows. Don’t bother keeping your relationship on the down low. Everybody in law school knows everything about everybody else. No one will be surprised about anything in your personal life. They may even know it before you do. For instance, I found out last night that I have a huge crush on another student, and I don’t date white guys. I was unaware of this change in my love life, but everyone else knows. That’s how the law school rumor mill works.

3. You still have to sit next to each other. The seating chart is made the first day of class and it doesn’t change. And the professors are not going to take “I just had a really bad breakup…” as a reason to do some last minute seat switching. And even if you don’t have to sit next to each other, there is a limited social pool in law school. You will have mutual friends. At some point, you will have to pretend to like each other at a bar review. Oh joy.

But it’s not all bad. In fact, there are a couple reasons FOR committing lawcest.

1. They get it. Have a mountain of reading to do for evidence? Oral arguments to present on Monday? Your lawcestuous partner will probably understand that you just can’t make that lovely date you planned together.

2. Convenience. It’s going to be a lot easier to schedule time together if you have the same schedule and all of the same assignments. You know what the other person is doing, so it’s easier to plan surprises and time together.

3. Study buddy. You can compare notes, help each other with outlining, and do research together. Also, study sessions just got a LOT more fun. ;)

Good luck to anyone who chooses this path. It’s probably worthwhile. Me, I’ll stick with the Boy for now. I don’t have the patience for the treacherous paths of lawcest.

Prescription: Law School

Well, it’s official. I’m sick for the first time this semester. Luckily, I’m only a little bit sick: hoarse, with a stuffy nose and itchy eyes. I was sick quite often last semester with much worse than this. I had a terrible cold, a trip to the emergency room, swine flu, and a case of what may have been pneumonia. I believe that I am well-qualified to offer advice about how to be sick during grad school. And so, the LIST OF SICK!!!

1. Don’t wait. If you think you’re really sick and need medical attention, go to the doctor’s office or the student health center or something. Do not wait until you have to call your Law School BFF to drive you to the emergency room early in the morning. (Also, if you need your law school BFF to drive you to the emergency room early in the morning, do not wake her up with a “Good morning, sunshine!” She will want to kill you.)

2. Take your medicine. Billy, don’t be a hero. Stuff yourself with meds. NyQuil before bed, the antibiotics that the doctor prescribed you, Tylenol for your headache and sore throat. Take it all. It’s important that you be able to cope with number three.

3. Go to class. Yes, you still have to go to class. Sure you’re sick now, but you’ll be sick again, and you can’t afford to start skipping class for no reason. Bring your Kleenex and a big cup of tea, and start taking notes. Also try not to sound like death, because of number four.

4. Don’t let anyone know you’re sick. Law students are particularly nervous people. If you get any of them sick, they will never forgive you. And do you remember that post about having friends? You should probably just avoid people while you’re sick. You won’t infect anyone else, and you’ll keep your secret.

5. Sleep. Medicine may be good for coping, but sleep is the magic ingredient of health. When I had the swine flu, I went home between classes and napped on top of getting ten hours a night. While it might get you a little behind on work now, you don’t want to lose time later because you’re even sicker.

There you go, the top five things to do when you’re sick in grad school. Have a great weekend everybody! I’ll be in the library driving myself a little crazy!

(For extra credit, see this post over on The Naked Redhead about why it's okay not to want kids. She's a funny chica!)

Everything in Moderation (Especially Moderation)

The great thing about law school is the endless work. I had at least 100 pages of reading last week, which I worked on faithfully. I broke it up by days, so that I only had to do a little bit at a time. Then I watched tv and played solitaire until my day was over. The only way to handle law school is by setting daily goals and reaching them. And then decompressing with a little bit of relaxation. Taking work day by day in moderation is the only way to deal with law school. You’ll be going crazy in a week if you don’t pace yourself.

However, moderation doesn’t always work. Friday eventually rolled around, and legal writing (the bane of any law student’s existence) came to kick us all in the butt. We were given four different assignments, three of them requiring hours worth of research. It wouldn’t be due until the following Friday, of course, but one of my best friend’s (who, for the purpose of this column will be called Baby B) was having his big birthday bash that night. So that’s how excess came into the picture.

I got out of class, went straight to the library, and started researching. I slogged through the first two assignments by 8 pm. I walked the two blocks home, threw my stuff in my room, and got showered and ready in record time. I headed out, even though I was dreading the time that took me away from schoolwork. I had a great time, culminating in dancing at the Hangge Uppe, not known to be Chicago’s classiest establishment, but a fun time with all of my law school friends. I shook off the stress of restarting school, and being in the library for 6 hours straight. I got home at 4 am. I got up at 9 am and went to the library.

Pain was my middle name. Noone should research on four hours of sleep after four hours of dancing. I couldn’t focus and I couldn’t walk. Nevertheless, I finished the third research project by 5 pm, at which point I went home and crashed until the next morning. I got up early on Sunday, went downstairs to Panera, and did my reading for Monday, so that I could reach my real goal for the weekend.

The goal being that Boy came into Chicago Sunday afternoon and because I crammed a week’s worth of work into a weekend, I got to take two days off and relax with him.

Moral of the story: The day-to-day law school life is one of moderation and pacing yourself. But it is possible to have fun, so long as you’re willing to throw moderation out the window and stare exhaustion in the face.

(By the way, it was one of the best weekends I’ve had in a long while, for anyone who wants to know.)

Sweet Home Chicago!

It's Monday! I may already be exhausted. I took the train into Chicago yesterday afternoon, and then got my giant suitcase and other luggage back to my apartment. It was the opposite of fun. Its not that the station is far away, it's just that the station has stairs. And I had an (at least) 20 pound backpack, a mattress pad, and a (very possibly) 50 pound suitcase. The suitcase is on wheels, but wheels don't matter when you have stairs. Wheels laugh in your face.

I then dropped all my stuff off at my apartment, and immediately ran to the bookstore to see what was left. I was so lucky as to get to buy all of my books new! (Insert sarcasm!) Six hundred and eight dollars later, I was prepared for the semester. Of course, I began studying immediately like a good law student.

Contracts is not what I expected. It's tiring. It's technical. It's COMPLICATED. The book made references to homunculuses! (Homunculi??) It took me way too long to get through the first assignment. Criminal Law was better. It was easy to understand, especially since the first nine pages was "What is a criminal?" "What is a crime?" Yes, book. Talk down to me. My brain hurts.

Property, surprisingly, may be my favorite class. So far, the cases are pretty easy to understand. But there's so much of it! 40 pages for tomorrow and another 30 for Thursday! I'm trying to get the whole week done today, but 70 pages of reading is an awful lot, and I haven't quite gotten used to the daily grind yet.

I also have not gotten groceries yet. However, the English muffins I bought before break? Still good. So news for the law/grad student: English muffins never go bad. If you buy them, you can stretch out grocery trips.

I have three great comforts at this moment:

1.) The legal writing assignment for this week should not be too awful. It's another research methods assignment, which only takes two hours or so. I can get that done in a day.

2.) Grades are finally in, and I will not be failing out of law school. Awesome.

3.) I have a brand new mattress pad. Yay for a soft bed to sleep in. Unfortunately, it tends to sing a siren song of slumber when I should be doing a 70 page property assignment.

Get Ready, Cuz Here I Come!

My first class begins in less than 36 hours at this point. We're looking at early morning contracts. As of yet, I have not made it back to Chicago, so I have no books. I hereby swear to get books first thing tomorrow. I have 40 pages to read/take notes on for Monday, and I'm ASSUMING another 20 for Tuesday. The syllabus for my Tuesday class (Property) says that the reading is "Notes 1 &2". There are no page numbers. I'm hoping that once I actually buy the book, I'll understand the syllabus. I'd hate it if my Property prof's idea of "hiding the ball" began with what in the world to read.

Property is definitely the class that scares me this semester. After they drilled the idea of land ownership being the most important part of the original American ideal, I just know that I'm going to end up memorizing some sort of 17th century English common law nonsense. Ick. Criminal Law and Contracts should be pretty rules-based, so no big worries there so far.

I am a little terrified of Legal Writing this semester, though. It sounds like it's going to be difficult and a lot of work. I'm not looking forward to actually doing my own research. Yes, I know that's most of a lawyer's work, but I don't want to hate the law library by March. Especially since I have to be in it for two more years. We'll see what happens.

Most of grades posted in the last two days. I did well enough to boost my confidence. I feel like I know what I'm doing with this law school thing. Still waiting for Torts, though, which was my least favorite class. I wonder when he'll get on that so I can waiting for the other shoe to drop. I just want to KNOW.

Meanwhile, I'll be pretending I'm not a law student until I arrive in Chicago tomorrow, and then LET THE STRESS BEGIN!!

"There's no need to argue, parents just don't understand."

"The world is a shitty place full of shitheads. You need good friends to talk shit about all of life's...shit."

This is not only a fact of life, but a real statement from a real person. That's what we call investigative journalism. Or repeating words out of other people's mouths. But it describes rule #1 of law school:

Make friends.

Because in all honesty, no one else is going to get it. The pain, strife, and heavy work load. The stress, and the fact that you're going a little crazy. The revelation that you want to drop out after every day. The panic of being cold-called on a case that you didn't really understand. The embarrassment when the professor gives you the "How did a dumbass like you get into law school?" look, and the excitement when the professor gives you a nod and moves on to torture someone else.

The other thing that no one is going to get is the ironic, sly, morbid sense of humor you're about to develop. Your parents, siblings, significant other, best friends, they're not going to find jokes about shotgun traps very funny. But your law friends will. And who else is going to loudly argue with you about medical malpractice and liability for AIDS battery in public while people push their food away from them in disgust? Not your cousins.

Everyone needs a support system. And while your mom may be the best person to call when you're having a terrible day and want to quit, or your SO may be the best person to talk to the night before your sure-to-be-horrific final exam, the most reliable part of your support system lies in the people you can call when you have huge holes in your outline. The people who give you their notes when you realize you just spent an entire civpro class playing solitaire. The people who tell you that you're being an ass when stress makes you act like, well, an ass.

The good friends to talk shit about all of law school's...well...shit.

1L....and a Half

The second semester of law school is beginning, and I'm still not entirely sure how I got here. One year ago, I was just receiving the acceptance letter to the Chicago school that I attend. (It's not John Marshall. I wish people would quit asking me if I go to John Marshall.) It was my first acceptance letter and I distinctly remember screaming and crying. In happiness. The screaming and crying from frustration started in October. At any rate, by March 1st, I saved my seat, and started taking out loans. Law school is horrifically expensive. I now know the meaning of the words "poor graduate student."

I also know the meaning of the words "res ipsa loquitor" and "certiorari." I'm still not sure how to pronounce that second word. I just say "cert" like all of my professors, who I'm pretty sure can't say it either. I also know more practical things, like how to craft dinner out of the leftover cans in the cabinet and the cost of rent in Chicago. Not law-related, but helpful for the graduate student on the run. Or more accurately, the graduate student who spends too much time in the library and not enough at the grocery store.

So if you're already in law school and know the meaning of this blog title, at the very least these law school chronicles will be good for a laugh and a wise nod of the head.

If you're thinking about law school, you'll learn the title soon enough and maybe gain a little bit of confidence. Or just warnings about what not to do, as I tend to stumble my way through life because doing things gracefully just isn't my style.

And if you have no intention of going to law school, because you're my mom and you discovered that this blog while I was typing on the couch: Don't actually run with fireworks. Mrs. Palsgraf wouldn't like that very much.