Cue the Laugh Track

I know, I know, it's Finals Week. That means I should be studying super hard. But the audition tapings for America's Got Talent were free admission. And I got four tickets. Did you think I would study instead?

Have you ever been to the taping of a television show? It's exhausting. We lined up to get in at 5 pm, finally got in the doors around 6, got sat, and then waited until 7 for the show to begin. Because America's Got Talent uses shots of the audience, we had to wait in line to sit down so that they could group by clothing color and other factors.**

About 30 minutes before the show started, one of the producers came up to our section and said, "You guys are right behind the judges. Expect the taping to go until 11. None of you are allowed to leave. This section CANNOT change. If you need to use the restroom, you will use it NOW. If you need to go get a drink, you will get it NOW." We all looked at each other, afraid of the commitment-heavy turn this fun night out had suddenly taken. "You will go apesh*t over EVERYTHING. Good, bad, I don't care. If someone stands up, you ALL stand up. Got it?" Then he walked away. Just left.

After that, the executive producer walked on stage and "trained" us in proper cheering and booing. By the time the 15 minute study session was over, I was already exhausted. And taping hadn't even started yet.

When the judges walked in, the sound was INCREDIBLE. It was insanely loud. Oddly, they all look taller in person, even if the stage looks MUCH smaller. And they were all so nice! Really, they must cut the footage to make the judges look cruel. Even Piers is absolutely sweet.

There were so many acts that I can't even recall them. (Good for NBC's intellectual property rights, I guess.) There were, however, a few standout acts in my mind, and if you watch the episode you'll know which ones they were. And you may even hear LSBFF's arab "Ay-ayayayayay!" yell.

I guess it's back to studying for the rest of the week.

But if you do tune in come June, I'm the tall one in green exactly 3 rows behind Piers Morgan dancing to the music.

___________________

**Most of the older people were in back. I know that's ageism, but it totally worked out for me.

Begin the Beguine

I still haven't figured out what a beguine is. I guess I should just google it, but I like a little mystery in my old jazz standards, don't you?

15 days until it's over. A whole year of law school behind me. I can't wait. However, I could probably do without the 2 weeks leading up to that amazing moment.

Last semester, our reading period was about 3 days, and each of our professors was trying to hold last minute review sessions. It made finals time feel even more stressful than it was. This semester we have a whole week to study. I'm finding that this is both good and bad. All this extra time means that I can schedule my studying better for optimal learning ability. However, all this extra time leads to a strong desire to slack off and take a couple hours away from work. That is not acceptable.

Studying for finals is a lesson in marathons. By the end of it, you're bleary-eyed and can't think straight anymore. Your head is filled with law, and your brain is just dying for a break. You can't sleep, however, because all of a sudden in your dreams you've forgotten what "cover" means in a contract for goods and you have to check it on your outline right that second. Nothing else will do. It is one of the most exhausting things I've ever had to do, and I've never done anything like it before.

In undergrad, even my hardest finals were only given 3 hours of study time. And that time was spent on the couch, relaxing with roommates while we watched tv. Not exactly the worst time of my life. Studying for finals in law school involves blocking yourself away from the rest of the world, headphones in to block noise, staring at notes and your computer screen for hours at a time. Sometimes you get company in the form of a study group. Today's involved absolutely ridiculous hypotheticals for criminal law.*

The point is, this is the worst part of the semester. I did a full twelve hours today, and I felt LAZY.

If it's the worst, at least it's also the shortest. 15 days.

_______________________

*Today we killed Baby B in a variety of ways trying to figure out what the appropriate mens rea was for different degrees of murder. I don't think he appreciated the humor.

You're Never Fully Dressed.....

I can't help but find it funny that in law school "long weekend" doesn't mean 3 days to drink margaritas and lay in the sun. "Long weekend" means too much work and hours and hours of studying. And after I take this bluebook and grammar exam in an hour, my "long weekend" can begin. Actually, it kind of started last night at the 1L Meet the Employers Reception.

I'm not good at networking. No matter how many times the career services staff reminds me that networking is how one gets a job, I still can't do it. I never know what to ask, so 25 tables of legal professionals had me shaking in my boots. Or pointy toed black pumps. But I guess my footwear choice is irrelevant.*

I will admit, that I did meet some really nice people, including one attorney who was a paleontology major in college. That's a lot like anthropology. If he got a job, maybe I will too one day. He was pretty reassuring, and told me "Some people are going to have a legal career and stick with it until the end. The other 6 out of 7 of you are going to swerve all over the place. So don't start worrying yet." It was a good feeling, knowing that I wasn't the only person who was confused.

Some of the attorneys were scary. There were a couple who clearly didn't want to be there, and only showed because the partners made them. And there was one who gave me a lecture on ObamaCare that sounded like I had made some kind of grave healthcare mistake. I wanted to apologize to him. But really, I just wanted to leave and couldn't think of a way to make a graceful exit. He just kept talking. After that, I took a break and ate some food. (God bless law school. They provide alcohol and snacks at all of these events.)

LSBFF is a networking goddess. I wish I could be like her. However, I think I've learned that no matter how much I love her,** I need to not work next to her. She's so awesome she makes me nervous. I'm better off striking out on my own and doing things my own way. It all goes back to the "branding" thing. She has a different personality type than I do. She can schmooze with the best of them. I'm better of at telling a joke to break the ice. It's not like I'm fighting for attention. I'm six feet tall. Someone will notice me.

I would say the best parts of the night, though, were in being snarky. James asked me more than once if I had a job yet. I replied more than once that I had been offered like ten and couldn't choose. And a couple of girls that we knew were wearing skirts WELL above the knee. Not that there's nothing wrong with that usually. I own a couple short skirts that I love. But this was a professional event! Who buys a suit with a skirt that stops three inches above the knee? Of course, when I mentioned this to someone else, his response was, "I guess that's how you get a job."

Yeah, with the creepy solo practitioner at the end of the row who can't look at your face.

And the very, very best part of the night? When one of the career services staff members came up to LSBFF and I and said, "Ladies, I want to put you on a poster. I can see your pantyhose."

That's right. I'm now the Law School poster girl for the proper wearing of pantyhose.

I was totally waiting to be famous one day.

_____________

*Let's be honest. Footwear choices are NEVER irrelevant.

**More than the moon and stars.

Who Wrote the Book of Love?

I'm sitting in the very last class of the year. It's Property. I've been faking focus this whole class while gchatting to LSBFF. However, I just realized how little I've been focusing during this class.

I looked down and saw that my criminal law book has been open this whole time and my property book is sitting closed to my right.

Yep. Must be the end of the year.

100 Points for Small Children and Old Ladies!

No more moping. I'm up, I'm ready, I'm raring to go.

Bring on the new day. Finals are coming, and I'm going to kick their asses.

Things have sucked lately, but screw them. There's no point in thinking about what I can't have, so I might as well go find things I CAN have.

Nobody get in my way. I will run you over.

Five points for pedestrians.

Fifty points for pessimists.

Future's So Bright, We'll Have To Wear Shades

Baby B found this blog and showed it to me today. It's true love!

On The Record In Cook County is a blog of things that are said in Cook County courtrooms. It gives me a little hope for my future career.

For instance, check out this little gem:

Defense Counsel- This officer's police department exists in a localized anachronism, where they feel it's ok to stop people based on race without recrimination.

State- I object judge!
Judge- Basis?
State- Defense counsel is using big words again that he knows that I don't know!
Judge- Response?
Defense Counsel- Indubitably.
Judge- Ha! Overruled.

ontherecordincookcounty.com

Feeling Less Than Zen

“Of course she felt insecure! Unless she was contracts-zen!” ~Prof. Jacobs

We’re discussing the “security principle” in contracts right now. Basically, the idea is you can cancel a contract if the other party commits a material breach. Material breach meaning, the other party really screws up and there’s quite a bit of contract to go. In that case, the other party may feel “insecure” and want to repudiate the contract.

I am less than zen right now too. Between finals, and scheduling next semester’s classes, and personal issues, and lack of sleep, I think that I could wallow in bed for the next 3 days and be very happy about it.

It’s over in 22 days, and the insecurity is mounting. But unlike in the world of contracts, I can’t ask for any sort of assurance that everything will be all right.

I feel like my life has materially breached.

Fashion Forward Fridays

It's time for another installment of Fashion Forward Fridays! This week: The Headband. This is definitely just a girl thing, so next week I'll do something boy-centric.

No, headbands are not specific to law school. In fact, headbands are pretty much a thing everywhere. But professionalism demands small, non-eyecatching jewelry for the most part. It's simple look, and there's not much you can do to dress it up. That's why headbands are the way of the future.

The boho scarf look is NOT what you're going for. Everyone say it with me now, "Silk printing is BAD." You also want to avoid the little girl look, so if your mom would have used it to hold your bangs out of your eyes when you were five, it's a no. Also, no cute little bows for the most part. Unless you can get it in a solid color and a boring fabric, just avoid it.

What is in? Jeweled, shaped, anything that has a touch of glamor without being overdone.

Some of the things I see a lot of?

Love the geometrically shaped jewels! When most of your clothing is one-color boring, this is beautifully eyecatching. But it's not so eyecatching that it would steal the attention from your equally gorgeous resume. I'd tell you where to find it, but I think it's homemade. Which is annoying, but for crafty people, it's AWESOME.

The metallic is probably the most versatile of all three, imo. You can wear it in a professional setting to add a little bit of interesting to everything else your wearing, if you wanted to wear it out at night, you could still go wild with your makeup and it wouldn't clash, and as you can tell from the photo, it looks great with a t-shirt and jeans. No complaints here! (Urban Outfitters, $18)

The last one is really popular for day-to-day wear, even though it's not something I would personally wear. It's a little too big for me, but it works on a LOT of people. Cute and made of chiffon, it definitely adds a little bit of whimsy to whatever you're wearing. (J.Crew 26.50)

In other words, headbands are more than just a headpiece that your mom makes you wear to avoid chewing on your hair now! Yay childhood do-overs!!

A Love Letter

I was faithful. I was kind. I tried everything that you wanted me to. I was always honest with you. About my love, about my schedule, about everything you needed from me. We were together all the time. In school, in the park, on the street, even in the bath, I was holding on to you with all my strength.

But I guess if you really love something you have to let it go, and if it comes back to you it was meant to be. But I needed you, and I still need you! I can't get through this life without you! Why are you determined to hurt me so much? Why do you want to give me such stabbing pain that sends me to my bed alone for hours.

I'm spending time and tears on you and you give me nothing in return! And I need you more than ever at this point. You can't desert me now! I need you round the clock, like I need to breathe!

Oh, coffee, I have to give you up in order to avoid the migraines.

I'm with your half brother Decaf now. It's not as good as when I was with you.

Forever love,

Me

Yo Ho Yo Ho A Pirate's Life For Me!

We’re discussing adverse possession in Property right now. It’s apparently a really important topic. So I’m glad we’re only spending two days on it and the professor is discussing it in his usual ambiguous way of having charts on the board with A,B,C,D written all over them. Each letter refers to a party, a piece of property, and a past owner of ONE parcel of property. In other words, there are three of each letter, each referring to a different object. There’s also some simple math up on the board and he’s been circling random blank spots on the board. And the words “rebellious convention.” Oh. Wait. No, it’s “reasonable connection” And he’s apparently creating a hypo with a whole NEW chart that makes no sense. Look, more numbers and letters. AND A CHART! That has no reference points.

Is it any wonder I don’t get anything out of property? I’m never going to be a half decent lawyer.

I'm getting a new career.

Land Pirate.

Fashion Forward Fridays

This is something I've been wanting to do for a while now. Law school has a specific dress code that you wouldn't even be able to guess at until your first day. The very first day of orientation, they tell you to dress professionally so that you make a good impression on your future gods...er, professors.

So every week I plan to pick one item of clothing and expound upon its virtues. This week, I pick the most fundamental of clothing options:

THE SUIT

Believe me, you're going to want a suit, or something to approximate it. Eventually, you're going to do an interview with SOMEONE (hopefully) and you'll need the suit to be appropriately dressed. Here are five reasons the suit is awesome:

#5: As I mentioned, that interview. If appropriately tailored and colored, you should look impressive.

#4: Versatility. I know. It's a SUIT. It's not THAT versatile. Au contraire. Personally, I own an all-black suit that without a splash of color makes me look like an undertaker. So I like matching it with grass green button downs and creamy silk shells. Also, for women there's the skirt/pants choice. Personally, I'm a fan of the skirt. My legs are too long to find suitpants that fit. But hey, there are other things to explore. Pinstripes, color, wide lapels. The suit IS versatile.

#3: Exploiting jealousy. Give yourself a leg up on the competition. Seriously, when your classmates see you wearing a suit, they wonder what kind of awesome opportunity you've found that means you get to wear a suit. Take that aura of mystery and turn it into confidence.

#2: SHOES. I'm all about the chance to buy shoes. And before you roll your eyes and call this a girl thing, a guy I know is CONSTANTLY looking up Italian leather shoes to wear with his suits. A great suit just gives you a chance to wear great shoes. Who can pass that up?

#1: It just feels good! Is there anything better than walking through downtown feeling like you fit in? No. there is not. Don't lie to yourself. Confidence is something that isn't always readily available in the world of law school, so you've gotta take it wear you can find it.

So, in the words of my favorite sitcome character: SUIT UP!

PUBLIC SAFETY NOTICE

OMG. I know I JUST posted, but this is too good to pass up. While sitting in contracts this morning, I got this e-mail from my undergrad, BSU:

"University Police are reporting two complaints of assault following incidents at approximately 8:00 a.m. this morning, April 7, in the vicinity of Worthen Arena and the Student Health Center. According to Assistant Chief Robert Fey, two women walking in the area reported being slapped on their buttocks by a white male as he rode past them on a bicycle. Fey urged anyone with information about these assaults to contact University Police immediately at 285-1111.

Police Chief Gene Burton also took the opportunity to again stress to all members of the university community that they remain alert to their surroundings at all times and, especially at night or in early morning darkness, refrain from traveling alone. As appropriate, he said, students and others should make use of Ball State's free shuttle service for convenient and safe transport across campus."

Okay. What you have to know about this area, is that at 8 am, it's beautifully lit. It's on the east side of campus so it gets perfect morning light. It's not "early morning darkness" as the e-mail describes. So here's what REALLY happened: Two full-of-themselves freshman girls were walking from their dorm at Studebaker East, and some guy from frat row a few blocks away rode up behind them on his bike and slapped them in the asses. They got indignant and went to campus police.

I have two problems with this:

#1: Really, BSU? You thought this was counted as "Public Safety Notice"? You even titled it "Assaults near Worthen Arena." This here, is a joke. And if I had been walking behind those two girls, I would have laughed until I cried.

#2: This mocks REAL assaults that do happen on campus. Honestly, I would say BSU is one of the safer campuses in the US. There's a low crime rate for the most part, and the cops are always available. We even have them riding around campus on bikes and they'll stop for ANYTHING. They give you tickets for public intoxication if you're not wearing your shoes. So, really, pretty safe. But real assaults DO happen, like at any college campus, and this isn't one of them. I was actually chased down the street by a pick-up truck late one night, terrified. I NEVER walked down that street after dark again. I didn't report that, but maybe I should have.

I just want there to be a new campus hero, now that Happy Friday Guy has retired. "The Caped Ass-Slapping Crusader."

It Depends How You Define Productivity...

I need to have Bravo taken off my cable network. It's like visual crack. I don't know how many hours I watched of Millionaire Matchmaker last night. (Okay, it was six hours. Yes, I'm ashamed of myself.) Bravo marathons are not good for me. I did, however, manage to get my taxes done, organize some insurance stuff, and make a to do list. It's like being productive. I had to do all those things.

At any rate, today is already looking like a bad day. It's rainy and gross outside. I'm using an umbrella. After a week of 70 and 80 degree weather, the high for the next few days is barely going to reach 50. And I forgot my coat today. Moreover, Dunkin' Donuts is having one of their off days where they try to train people during the 8:30 am rush. Not only did I have to explain my order 3 times, I still got the wrong cup of coffee. And it tastes burned. I still have to call the insurance company (which I hate doing) and I have to go to the post office which is always full of people.

On the other hand, Easter candy is half off. Yay.

But the thing that bugs me the most? People walking in late to class. Every day. Every once in a while is fine. But the same people walk in 5-20 minutes late EVERY DAY. When the professor looks around the room, sees it's only half full and asks someone "Is the clock in here wrong?" you should probably start coming to class on time.

I mean, stuff happens, it's a fact. You missed your train, you fell asleep in the shower, the undergrads were overfilling the elevators and you couldn't get up to the eighth floor, it all happens. But when it happens every day, it's rude and distracting.

Also, it makes my day even worse than it was before.

Who Can Say if I've Been Changed For The Better?

Nothing is certain but death and taxes.

Taxes are due April 15, and I'm hoping death is a long way off. Beyond that, everything changes. A cold, windy winter has turned to a gorgeous Spring. People have switched to sundresses and flipflops, t-shirts and big, sunglasses. We now have thunderstorms instead of snowstorms, and sometime over the weekend, the city of Chicago saw fit to change its street displays from moss-green ferns to pink and yellow tulips.

Relationships change. My favorite couple got engaged last week (Congrats!) and another friend saw that her relationship was just not going to work. My mother is starting to accept that her children are too old for Easter egg hunts, but she's going to get a new puppy for excitement around the house and companionship. My father has a new job, that should be just as stressful as the old one, but he is currently the most successful departmental manager in North America in his company. My brothers and I have reached a new level of understanding and support. One that includes calling to ask if the other person is all right, as well as teasing each other until we pull out the name-calling.

And even I've changed. I've gone from a person unsure of her own abilities, to a person who is learning to love the law. I have everything I could want for the first time in my life, and I don't want to quit anymore. In 36 days, I'll no longer be a 1L, and that's one change that I'm waiting for impatiently.